Steps to create a good relationship between parents and grandparents
The importance of grandparents in the lives of children is more than proven, the grandparents not only change the lives of children and their parents, but they become transcendental in the care, education and protection of children in home.
Importance of grandparents in the lives of children
The grandparents have ceased to be the absent parents of the parents, who visited on weekends or during the summer that consented to their grandchildren. The importance of grandparents in the lives of children has grown considerably. These are great friends of the children, take care of them, take them, attend their obligations, feed them and share their experiences with them.
They constitute, so to speak, in a few seconds, the fundamental axis in the balance and the sustenance of the home since many parents do not manage to harmonize effectively their work life and their family life.
In spite of the wonderful experience, this fact can represent several negative consequences that grandparents cannot enjoy their retirement quietly and instead have to take care of young children, or even that parents feel dissatisfied with laxity with which children are treated with their grandparents.
The inter-generational relationship
The grandparents assume their role with great joy. For them it is revitalizing and they feel useful and companions of the children; others assume this role to help their children because their work obligations require it. There are also other grandparents who do not accept taking care of their grandchildren since they have already educated their own children and say they have no strength or health to take care of the children.
Sometimes parents often abuse their grandparents, without being aware of the experience they live and their influence on physical or emotional health. To avoid any setback it is essential to discover all the elements that surround the situation and turn them into education agents in this family model.
Regardless of the problems, the relationship between grandparents and grandchildren is quite enriching, children make their grandparents feel more spontaneous, loved, respected and vital, while children feel much more curious, a more reflective, affective point of view and happy.
To avoid conflicts, parents must respect the way their grandparents act, behave and care for their children; with the passage of time, the grandparents educate the children according to their personal model, although it differs from the parents’ model.
Advice for the relationship between grandparents, parents and grandchildren
- Tell parents about family rules and routines, respect the way in which they want to educate their children.
- Do not criticize or give advice to parents trying to educate the children as you would.
To the parents:
- Do not overload your grandparents, respect their resting times.
- Trust them, since they have educated their own children they will know how to do it with their grandchildren; avoid rivalries by asking questions like “did you miss me?”
- Be clear enough about the role of everyone in the home.